I had to get the bus into town last week. I arrived at the stop with 10 minutes to spare. I was the only one there, which isn't unusual as I live on a route that is mostly small villages along the shore road. So, while waiting, I just watched the activity on the sea loch and practiced some "stillness standing."
The bus arrived; I got on and found a seat. I had planned to spend my 45-minute journey listening to an audiobook, but when I sat down, still experiencing the quiet from the standing, I no longer felt like doing that and chose instead to just take in the view.
The journey was interesting. I didn’t feel like thinking about anything or commenting on anything. Thoughts would bubble to the surface, but no attention was given to them; I simply wasn’t interested. It wasn’t meditating; it was effortless. I would feel my larynx about to subvocalise something and, again, I just wasn’t interested in carrying it on.Ir dropped. It wasn’t suppression or apathy; it was something else—a very present but light attending, very centreing. This state lasted the journey and beyond and only began to fade once I met my friend and returned to the flow of everyday conversation.
Strone Bus Shelter :-)
Today, Monday,I had another interesting work experience. I had my morning planned: Finish some web work which would take an hour, then some outside practice for a bit , then make some raised beds to allow us to get some alliums grown over Winter into the ground.
Work was going fine then I had a problem with a printer, I could have left it, but chose to fix it. I spent an hour on it and near the end I was feeling a bit frustrated at going off track and not getting outside yet. I've been exploring 'feelings/attitudes' that are closer or further away from being centred at work, so I got interested in the 'frustration' feeling in terms of the stillness experiences. I had the thought "I can just take a break now and get outside for an hour and finish the work later'" and I nearly didn't go along with that, as my subconscious immediate impulse was to 'just finish the work and get out later' like some mad Calvinist delayed gratifiication robot. Fortunately I was present enough to catch that 'would be decision' as it was mentally forming and before I 'automatically' consented. I swear I would just have kept working a month ago. Instead, I got myself outside.
This 'attending from a stillness perspective' is working like a solvent, dissolving less conscious habits that are masquerading as conscious, sensible choices.