Context:
Two weeks ago, after practicing Stick in San Ti Shi—cycling "Chamber-Step-Strike" with the cavities and anchor sacrum—I got a surprising release of the ribs of the lower back. I mentioned that after about three days, my back "locked up a bit" and was feeling stiff.
After discussing this with Sifu, I went back to basics. I mostly worked on the foot couple and left the transverse couple out of standing, although I would still include it in other practices.
In last Sunday’s class, I was again discussing my "progress" around this. I had gone right back to the beginning and started building the 10 points, starting with the backstop. I explained this to Sifu who mentioned that once you have found the foot couple, you don’t need the backstop anymore—and this started me musing around my experience of the last week.
In trying to find the backstop, I realised I had been chasing old sensations.
When I first found the backstop, I would get a real sense of solidity on the heel; my weight would drop more into my feet, and I was more grounded without sinking.
I had been looking for that exact feeling again and just couldn’t get it. As I re-examined my efforts, I found that I had been trying to recapture that feeling by subtly trying to release my sacrum. Initially it just felt like a tension , an interference , then I caught 'me doing the interfering', reacting to a more subtle 'red button' and i pressed it !
These days, almost a year in, my feet feel light —and I like that they feel light. I'm still grounded but don't have the same heaviness of my old collapse. I realised I was subtly trying to force an older feeling of being "solid," rather than simply activating the foot couple and following what that practice suggested.
As I was thinking and experimenting with this, I also had in mind Sifu's suggestion to me on Sunday which was about 'releasing my twist from the inside'. That really landed, and I have been monitoring my standing with this in mind asking myself " Am I doing something with the shell, or is this coming from the inside?"
I stopped chasing the old , that I wasn't aware I was chasing, and things started to release.
I am now left pondering 'How much interference?' I was sublty interfering and couldn't see it. What about my imore conscious interference.
Training is intereference. How do I approach Stretch, Stretch, Stretch ? The 'how' of the stretch - is the 'how' stopping me sensing the subtleties that I need to recognise to progress. Lighter Lighter Lighter Yi ? ;-)
There's Always more..